So here I am again. Since I'm awake and feeling like I'm on waiting on the horizon for the sun to rise what better to do than to blog? And for the record I dislike the term blog. It's so bloggy and not at all eloquent. I prefer something like "shoot the breeze," journal, or simply run at the mouth (or my fingers really). This is not what I've come here to talk about though.
So, per usual my job still drives me nuts. With each day I go there I feel I'm losing a part of myself and replacing it with a bitter morsel of dispair or even enmity. And the more I complain about it the bigger the hypocrite I feel. I must put my feet where my mouth is. And if there is one thing nurses have the freedom to do it is walk out the door and find another place that needs us just as much. Granted that my current type of nursing is not my cup of tea. In fact most of the current healthcare...scratch that. Most of our current state of health in America is not my cup of tea!
So you might ask, what would you do about it then? Well, that is exactly what I harp on about on a regular basis (or enough to be known around my circles as a health nut): health promotion. Yes...encourage humans to live to their fullest instead of being slaves to consumerism, inactivity, diseases of affluence, and otherwise zombie-like existences.
[insert ad for Wall-E here...is this really too far off?]
sooooooooo...i've been walking around saying i want to do something like health promotion...and then i would usually say "yes, but i can't afford to work at the health department." or "the job i want doesn't exist. no one cares about preventing disease in the first place. they would rather just treat it once it's too late."
but after my job ticked me off for the last time i came home in search of another one. and what to my wondering eyes should appear? but a job posting entitled "health promotion representative". i was so excited about the job description i jumped right into editing my resume instead of sleeping. and you don't know how much i usually detest resumes.
so basically, I'm hoping to be hired based soley on my enthuasism for the subject. haha. no really.
in the meantime i'm still on a vegan kick. which is really not a kick at all, but just a new way of living. and i find this has led me into the world of organic foods..which has led me back to the idea of gardening...which has led me to be firmly stuck on the idea of organic gardening...which puts all sorts of ideas and dreams into my head about healthy food, poor people, fully enriched lives, happiness, and bluebirds, and all that other crap that will get you thrown into the freak category. and this does not even take into account that i'm a christian or the music i listen to (which i'm told counts as "hippie-catterwalling").
all these changes and the thinking i've done lately has led me to the conclusion that i need not have this thick skin or toughness i've been wishing for all this time. Instead i believe that being myself might just lead me out of the wrong paths and onto the ones that actually enrich my life. so yes...i can still be a kid...but only in the sense that maybe as a child i was the real me.
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