Wednesday, February 04, 2009

i wish the west wing were still on

Boy, it's been awhile since I posted to this blog. Perhaps, it's because I've been forcing myself to blog daily during the year of 2009. I decided that a daily blog would make me accountable to life. I don't know that's it working, but I hope that by talking about my days I will not let them slip by. I'm afraid I might turn into someone recording their experiences on camera instead of actual experiencing them. So, basically my multiple blogging has distracted me fromm the others I usually do.

Oh life. life, life, life. I've been learning a lot about life...well specifically God's life-giving spirit. It's cool. I think the purpose of receiving God's spirit and then sharing it with others, sure makes things simple. And I like simplicity. And I'm pretty sure I finally figured out my actual gifting, among my million hobbies. This is pretty fantastic. I was always a bit jealous of those people who were awesome at one thing since birth. They had no doubt in their minds, they just had one thing to do, and could do it well. I on the other hand run the gamet when it comes to hobbies and interests...so much so that my time is never focused on one. This makes me good at nothing. So now that I'm pretty sure God showed me my gifting is somewhere in writing or storytelling. And I feel a little bit giddy.

The weirder part (and for those non-believers out there...you might think I'm a nut starting about now) is that I suddenly realize that is the area that satan will of course try and rob me. It only makes since that if God's plan is for me to glorify him and to set others free through my writing that Satan would hate this the most. I discoverd this because the other day I had the freakiest dream. Right as I fell asleep I was suddenly dreaming of myself lying in bed in my room. Only my room was not quite the same. The furniture was rearranged slightly. The lighting seem to be that of candles...sort of a dark glow. In the air, I could hear music. It was sort of old fashioned music someone might play on an upright piano in a western or something. Only, it was being played on the toy piano I actually have in my room in real life. And the scariest part was that someone was gagging me, or sitting on my chest so that I had no air in my lungs to be able to speak. I became more aware of my muteness and tried to scream. I could not. This is when panic set in and I tried to wake up. I was not only mute, but paralyzed. Finally I guess I was able to make a groan in the physical because my mom heard and came in to check on me. This is not my first nightmare, so she was quick to the rescue. Thank goodness. Thinking back, I've had these reoccuring dreams of being mute. This is very interesting.

So lots of lessons learned lately. What else? Soon I will be on days. Still at my old job. It seems the job I hoped for was already filled. I'll keep on keepin on. Still looking regularly for something better. I hope that days will return me to my former human..and less zombie-like self. I get to go to NYC soon. So that should be fun. Started some guitar lessons...hoping these will make me a less sloppy player and get me over my plateau. I've only been to one, but I expect the lessons will do just that.

And I suppose I should mention my title. I do wish the West Wing was still on. I've been watching a marathon with my mom starting from season 1. She used to give me heck about liking the show and now she likes it too. My brother even snuck in a disc according to my mom. The writing is awesome. Some people dislike the idealism and mistake it for preaching. Okay, maybe there is a bit of preaching. I don't care though, I think that's what a good piece of art does. It is not stuck in reality, but can inspire you to better things. I'm not a big fan of politics. I'm sort of a more "pay Ceasar what you owe him" and "trust in God, not man" kinda gal, but I do love that show.

I keep finding myself wishing for more seasons. I love the characters. The actors were great. I've been youtubing and googling everyone to see what they are up to. Allison Janney rocks any screen she shows up on. Poor Bradley Whitford lost out when Studio 60 was cancelled. Janel Moloney apparently moved to NY to do theatre. I have no idea what Martin Sheen is doing. And I wish there was just more Richard Schiff in the entertainment world. Of course that's not all of them, but I do miss the quality that show had. Don't get me wrong, I love my show Bones, but it's not like the West Wing. They are just different genres really. Sure, they both fall under television drama...but there's just no comparison.