Monday Musings

Today should have been Tuesday so I could have called this blog Tornado Tuesday. Oh well. I've had too much coffee late in the day and have nothing better to do (well nothing I want to do...plenty of things I could do) than write a random blog. I can't think of one topic to write about, so this will just be a hotchpotch of thoughts. And that's okay because that's pretty much me: random.

Today was my best friend's birthday, which reminds me I need to pay rent. I had fun dodging the tornado's to venture out to the lovely Provino's italian restaurant (about the only place that will give you a free birthday dinner anymore). I got there early, which was a good thing. And sat at the bar drinking my diet coke while the tornado sirens wailed and I waited for the rest of the party to show up late. I seriously love my friend and her family. They are so hilarious. I asked for the rights to their life story. I think they should either be a cartoon or an epic trilogy...not sure which. Maybe I should just make a documentary, so I capture their real essence. I'm not sure there are any actors out there that could do them justice.

I should have recorded the dinner, because there were so many crazy one-liners flying from her mom's mouth. Just an example is when she told the waitress "I'll buy her dinner since it's free, but I'm not paying for the beer. I don't believe in it." I agreed and said the two of us were heading up the temperance committee. Of course when I tried to order my dinner sans cheeze her mom piped in again "She and my daughter are both crazy. This one's VAY-GAN (aka vegan). She doesn't eat anything from an animal. And that one's gonna drink herself to death. That's why they're friends."

So anyhoo, I had a good time. I'll have to think of the best route for their story. Seriously, they would make a good movie.

What else. I tried to sleep in today. All weekend when I had to wake up early for work I told myself..."just get up now and Monday you can sleep in." Well at 0600 I was wide awake and so were the cats..being extra obnoxious. Does this mean I'm getting old, when I can't stay asleep? I read emails and junk for a couple of hours and then went back to sleep until 1pm though. What the heck? I really need to exercise again. That'd probably help get me back on track. I think the longer I'm a nurse the more immune I am from the effects of coffee.

Work has been surprisingly better the last few months. I like my co-workers and that helps a lot. Of course, some days I think they are trying to kill me with the patient loads. And I must have been super clear that I have no desire for extra responsibility outside of the 3 12's cause they keep promoting newer employees. I think if nursing were my thing I'd feel differently, but I can only give my 100%...well 99% maybe (coffee and skeleton decorating take up 1% of my time) for 3 days. Anything more than that is torture.

My goal would be to devote my other 4 days off to working on what I actually like: writing. And for awhile I was doing good with that. However, I get friends calling me up always wanting to do something. And I'd feel a little guilty and lame if I were like "no, I gotta do some amateur writing today. sorry." And then I'm not sure how or why keeping 500 sq feet clean is so tricky. Maybe I should only have one plate, one fork, one spoon, etc. It would sure cut down on dishes. It is a cruel thing not to have a dishwasher btw.

What else is new? I think I've determined that for a long time I've overcomplicated or over thought what it means to serve God. I keep getting this drilled into my head as of late. It's not about going off and doing some huge thing, or becoming a super awesome speaker, or whatever religious image one could think of to represent a perfect Christian. And I think the term perfect Christian might be an oxymoron. It's just about getting filled up with HIM and sharing his love with the person in front of you that needs Him. It's about getting over yourself and being willing to submit and do something or open your mouth at any given time. Why do we make it so hard?

Then there are days where I feel like I have no idea what to say to someone. There are so many hurting people and I know God can help them, but I don't want to misrepresent so I end up saying nothing. Yeesh. How terrible is this? Or when it comes to writing I feel like there is some trap that Christian writers (including myself) fall into where the Truth gets replaced with some mealy mouth religious blah blah blah that is so bland and lacking zest. Most of the "Christian programming" I've ever seen is terrible and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone. When I listen to classic composers who used their music to glorify such an awesome God I wonder why he can't be glorified with our contemporary arts. Why does satan get all the good stuff on TV?! And why do the Christian characters always turn out to be religious nut job serial killers? Is it impossible for the power of such a Sovereign God to be portrayed in the arts? I just don't know. I've seen some cool Jesus stuff in theatre. Maybe I should start writing plays. :D

oh my. Well Jesus Help and goodnight.